I am so bad with plants that I once exploded a cactus- a plant that’s nearly impossible to kill.
His name was Ronald. (I name all my plants in hopes that will give them reason to live.) I like to think of Ronald’s departure less as a sad occasion and more as an explosive tribute to my black thumb.
The only thing about this that makes me sad is that people always say to get a plant before a getting a pet or having a child. I can only hope that should I have either of those someday, they would fare much better.
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